One of the things that happened to me during the planning of our wedding was the huge eye opener I got regarding relationships. Family relationship but mostly friends. It is rather amazing how a huge event in your life can really show you who your friends are and who you can depend on.
There were a few people that I considered to be my friends and so many of them really stood out. They spoilt me, went out of their way for me, gave up their time for me. Without asking for anything in return. Then there were the people that I really thought would stand out and they didn’t. Going into this we had agreed that we would tell everyone that there is no obligation. We know times are hard and it was very last minute and we would not take any offense to anyone not being able to make it. Loads of people were honest with us and we really really appreciated it.
What got to me was people having really silly excuses and felt it necessary to tell me lies. About unimportant things. People that suddenly didn’t have the time to say anything to me – not even about the weather – when before we would have endless discussions about anything and everything.
Most interesting to me of course is the family member that insisted they were coming, never pitched and till now have not been in contact.
It’s not about what these people do for me or did for me. It was about wether I (we) mattered to them as much as they mattered to me (us). I don’t like people lying to me. The thing I appreciate the most is honesty. A while ago I was quite upset with a friend of mine because she said she wouldn’t be able to do certain things for me. It took me a little while but I now realise that she was friend enough to be honest with me and I appreciate that most of all.
One of the things that was just reconfirmed for me was that my best friend is Willie. He is everything I need and want in a friend. I can tell him my darkest secrets and my mundane stories. We ca be quiet together or do silly things together. I am so lucky to have him as my best friend.
Ok, rant over. My shoulders feel a little lighter and I am smiling again. Roll on spring.
